Your ego is not really you. Learn why you struggle to accept a compliment.
I’ve never been one who liked attention called to me. I spent my life avoiding people throwing birthday celebrations for me and feeling extremely awkward about public praise, both at work and in social situations. I have no problem giving it, but receiving it feels unnatural for me. Let’s talk about why it’s difficult for some people to accept a compliment.
For years, I thought that’s because I must have some self-confidence or self-image issue, and maybe I need to work through that with a therapist. But yesterday the revelation came to me: this is not my problem at all. If we all are part of a whole, a concept that I am embracing more every day, then that means that compliments and bolsters directed at the ego which identifies as Emily (“me”) are misguided.
Starting in the past month or two, I am living every day in the awareness of the reality around me. I’m aware that the energy that fuels my consciousness and the ego that I call “Emily” is derived from the same source that yours is. If you give me a compliment, I feel awkward simply because I do not seek the elevation of my ego anymore. I seek the elevation of all of us together, because we are one. And when you direct a nice sentiment about me or the character I am playing in this life, it is actually a compliment directed at all of reality and about you as well. To single me out and give me kudos for the “self” that I am experiencing is only encouraging me to be more attached to it. But that is no longer what I seek.
And maybe I sensed this was the case all my life, and it’s surfacing now that I am exploring reality.
I invite you to join me in eliminating the attachment to the ego and embracing the oneness of the universe. The attachment to your ego and the encouragement of others to be attached to their egos only creates more pain and loneliness, trust me. You have an aversion that makes it hard to accept a compliment for a good reason. Suffering can all be traced back to that attachment. Perhaps you derive joy from flattery, but then you are also leaving yourself open to derive sadness and pain from insult.
