Do You Know Why You Exist?

Seriously, what is the point of your life? Are you just living without knowing why?

I once asked one of my students in Korea, “What is the purpose of your life?” He was eighteen years old, sitting in the foreign teachers’ office — my office — where he and some friends often found refuge from the harsh reality of Korean school. “To study hard so I can go to the best university, then to get the best job, and marry the best wife, then have a baby,” he answered. Someone had put all of this into his head. It stuck with me after all these years; a memory that broke my heart.

Why are you here? Are you here to just make a living, have a family, eat whatever makes you happy, and try to avoid death as long as possible? This sounds pretty boring if you ask me. In my life, I want to do more than just procreate and stay alive. To me, living day to day without meaning for a hundred years seems worse than living for a short time with a greater sense of purpose.

Loving this content and want to go deeper? Book a Session with Emily, Take Her Classes or Buy Her Books!

You’ve heard all this before — at least I certainly hope you have. In our souls, we know that life is more than just being alive. But our fears add a veil to this true knowledge, it layers fear-based thoughts and feelings on top of our excitement at being alive.

We have forgotten how to live.

So many of us today are living in complete avoidance. They avoid thinking deeply. Worse than anything: lately, they live just to avoid dying, and not much more than that.

If you’re living just to evade death, then you’re already dead.

But you already know this deep in your soul.

Life isn’t just survival.

Being alive as a human being is a gift. You, in this manifestation, are a miracle. Why would you spend your days in fear instead of love and gratitude?

Don’t choose fear.

When you live in survival mode, you’re not much better than an animal. Why? Because humans have the ability to reflect on their existence. We have the ability to transcend death by understanding our eternal nature. We have the incredible ability to understand that death is nothing to fear and every minute of life is a gift. We can choose to identify with fight-or-flight reactions or calm responses, rising above our habits and our own minds.

If you are making all of your decisions based on avoiding sickness, injury, and death, then you are even worse than an animal. Animals accept the risks of being alive — life is a risk. At least, it can be a risk if you are in that mindset.

It can be an adventure full of accepted ups and downs if you choose an abundance mindset.

You see, you have a choice at any moment whether you will give into the fear in your vicinity. Whether you’ll believe everything you read or hear. Whether the words of others rule you or you are the master of your own mindset.

If you can keep a mindset of gratitude, a love for every minute alive, and resist the temptation to be afraid any moment of a total change or ending to the life you’re living, then isn’t that truly being alive?

Death isn’t your enemy.

Life was never guaranteed. You have the power to overcome your fear of dying. Death happens to us all; swallow that. It might need to sink in for a bit.

It happens to us all and none of us knows when it will come or how. Nothing is guaranteed.

Nothing is guaranteed except the present moment.

You have right now. Your choices right now are what matters.

Your life can change right now. Your mind can be a place of expansion, freedom, and happiness right now. Why restrict it to avoiding something that might happen in the future? What if you never died, wouldn’t that be interesting? You simply don’t know what will happen, so there’s no point living to avoid your life’s ending. You’re defeating yourself before you even get to know what it means to be alive.

Some people even live in fear of becoming accidental murderers. They think that each of their actions may lead to someone else’s injury or death, so they’d better watch every step. This is a fear-based reaction that assumes the world is random and evil. It is a response from a mindset of victimhood — that everyone is a victim of someone else, and people aren’t responsible for their own lives.

People don’t need protection from invisible threats that may arise in your wake. Your only task is to make choices out of love.

This may confuse others who are gripped by fear. Since we are each part of a whole, your choice to stop living in order to save someone else is just as damaging as it is to live your life happily and unintentionally cause harm. It means you’re taking on the burden of other people’s suffering where you didn’t need to, and reducing your own happiness as a sort of sacrifice to theirs. But others’ happiness is their own responsibility.

If you live from a place of love, no one will suffer from your happiness, trust me. You will always know the right choices to make.

You have the power of your own mindset, and no one else. Death certainly doesn’t.

Live with some meaning or purpose.

Like my former Korean student, you might be living with the idea that you need to check certain boxes and then you’ll be happy. You’ll be happy by someone else’s standards. But, have you thought about your own definition of happiness?

What if you were raised to think life was all about being smart, but you actually don’t care if you’re smart? What if you were taught to value a marriage with kids, but you don’t actually resonate with that situation for your life?

Live with intention. Live with purpose.

To live beyond the limiting existence of an animal in a constant fight-or-flight reaction, you must go beyond your basic assumptions about life. Stress is going to get to you if all you’re doing is running away from risk, illness, and death. Ironically, stress is a known factor in many illnesses, so you’re shooting yourself in the foot.

Figure out what your soul is telling you. Understand who you are beyond the frantic thoughts, panic, confusion, and urgency. Beyond the survival mechanisms that have been a flimsy layer of protection against the world.

Who are you?

Once you figure out who you truly are, your life’s meaning will rise above the rest of the things going on in your life. Your life’s meaning isn’t your job. It isn’t your university major. It isn’t your marriage. These are things you’ve accumulated on your journey.

No. Your life’s purpose and meaning were there all along, from birth. Your life’s meaning probably has something to do with your relationships with others or service to others.

Give meaning to everything you do.

The funny thing about the present moment is that it’s always moving but it’s also always here. You have the ability right now to change what’s going on. Tapping into this feeling of freedom, so you’re not an automaton, allows you to have a sense of total control. With this freedom and control, you can do exactly what your heart tells you, and this is the meaning that you’re searching for.

It was never outside you. It was always within.

Allow your life to have the meaning that it deserves by detaching yourself from expectations and assumptions. Break free of fear, even fear that you think is in the realm of “precautionary” because you think you’re better safe than sorry. This is also a notion given to you by fearful people, and it doesn’t belong to you.

It’s not part of your true nature.

Your true nature is to be free and grateful for the life you have at all moments. Your excitement at being alive is something to cherish and preserve. Don’t let it be taken away by the voices around you attempting to bring you into a life of fear.

You have your life in your own hands. Stop living as if it’s in someone else’s. Stop living as if you’re supposed to be exempt from death.

As for the student I mentioned at the beginning of this piece, I actually contacted him as I began to write this. He is about twenty-six years old now. I was curious about what his current outlook was like, and he told me that he has since completely changed his mind. He outgrew his mindset about life’s purpose. Now, he’s a happy elementary school teacher in Korea, moving through life’s unexpected gifts just like the rest of us.