When he died, I died, too.
The main event was four years ago — my twin flame died. It woke me up and shook me up — I was slapped in the face by the universe. Then I was placed back into this movie to deal with this weird world and my newfound perspective on it. I consider it the catalytic moment of my life — nothing about me before he died was the same afterwards.
I was shown difficult and mind-blowing truths about existence in a short period of time because I met my twin flame. Then, when he died, I was expected to just keep living somewhat similarly to how I had been before. I had to keep going on in a world that mostly seems empty and cold. It almost felt like I was in a dollhouse.
I Died and Began Again
When my twin flame died, I died, too. It was the end. I was a different Emily before that event. It was the event of all events — the watershed moment of my life. It’s when everything ended — my hopes, desires, aspirations, and personality. I lost it all. Attachments to worldly pursuits fell away. I literally stopped caring. It was horrible and liberating at the same time.
That event was the origin of the new me. But the new me never fully re-grew her attachments to this world. And that makes me dangerous at times — because I feel like I’m already dead, so I might just give up on whatever it is I care about at any moment.
Non-Attachment
Nothing really scares me anymore — at least not like it used to. I know I can lose everything in an instant because it already happened once. So, I am ready for it to happen again. Death certainly isn’t scary — I already died, after all.
It’s easy for me to detach from situations that used to stress me out. Whenever I feel like it, I could throw in the towel and call it a day because all of this is an illusion anyway. It’ll come to an end sooner or later. So why care so much? Now I try to just enjoy it as it comes. I know it’s temporary.
On my grieving journey, I’ve gone from losing almost all hope to finding a reason to be here — but it feels fragile. If I am not committed to staying here and helping other souls, I can crash back into the dark mindset I used to embody. So, I stay light and free by not becoming too attached to the plot of this story I am living.
Finding a Reason to Be Alive
I’ve said for years that I am just making up reasons to live. I know that sounds suicidal to people, but it’s not. It’s just a lack of enthusiasm for entangling myself with life on earth. There’s no way out of this human life— it’s like the Hotel California. You can check out, but you can never leave.
So, I’m checked out.
This manifestation is just a prelude to the next realm. We don’t escape our problems by escaping our human bodies. Problems follow you to the next place, and Earth is the best place of all to solve them and settle your karmic debts. You can go through life being stressed about all the things going on, or you can release attachments to it all and experience it — as a person who’s checked out but still here to observe.
So, I’m not saying I want to die. I am saying that after my twin flame died, I felt different about it. It seems like this is all just made up. None of it is real.
Twin Flame Coaching
Hi, I’m Emily! Talk about your twin flame and spiritual journey with someone who gets it. Understand the purpose of this experience for you. I provide guidance in the form of talk sessions and psychic readings. Read more about me here.
Buy the Book
Twin Flames and the Love Story Within (2022) and Twin Flame Transcendence (2023) are available on Amazon!
Twin Flame Support Group
A growing online community of interactive support where you can talk about your twin flame experiences in a safe space, led by Emily.
