I’m finally reading Eckhart Tolle’s The Power of Now. Many of my readers over the years have suggested I read him, and now I understand why. His writings and mine are aligned. He explains how to heal from past trauma in a way I hadn’t encountered before.
In this book, ways of approaching emotions and thoughts with non-attachment are described in detail. These ideas are nothing new, as they have shown up in philosophies from around the world since the beginning of time. It all relates to mental freedom. But I just love the way he explains the “pain body” and something started to happen to me after I read his words about it.
He explains that we should bring the pain body into the full consciousness of now, and then it dissolves. You can transmute your pain very simply — but most of us just give into it and let it take hold of our actions. But we don’t have to let it have control of our lives. It can become a normal process to acknowledge the “pain body” as it arises and face it full-on so that it can’t have power anymore. I’d like to share how this has been happening for me.
Emotions Leftover From Past Trauma
I’ve been practicing awareness of my thoughts and emotions for a while (after all, I am a meditation instructor), and for me, minor stressful situations often don’t ruffle my feathers as much anymore. However, strong emotions that stem from my past trauma and my fear of abandonment, distrust of others, and anger about what people are doing to me still arise and take hold pretty quickly because they are stronger than the smaller, similar emotions. And they are stronger than my conscious thoughts of equilibrium and joy that I may normally have.
These very strong emotions related to past trauma are the ones I target with this practice of transmutation.
I had a boyfriend who died a couple of years ago. And I am still healing and working out the trauma that caused in me. There are many emotions attached to grief. They are hard to sift through at times. I try to identify them as best I can — anger, fear, sadness — and they come at me without notice at the drop of a hat. New experiences like the one I am about to describe can call up my trauma like a wave rushing at me.
Recognize the Trigger
A man I went on a date with several days ago texted me today. He said, “Hey, how’s your week going?” which is an innocent enough text. In most people’s worlds, I am very aware, it’s normal to hear from a guy three days after the date or whatever. I don’t care for those games myself, but with the added trauma of having a boyfriend who didn’t text me back for days because he turned out to be dead, this was a real trigger for me.
The “pain body” comes right out of the shadows and says: “Anyone who doesn’t keep in regular contact with you doesn’t care whether you’re dead and they don’t care to let you know they’re not dead!”
The anger and sadness flare up. I am triggered. I suddenly find myself with an urge to respond in anger. This person has done nothing wrong and yet I want to tell him off because he doesn’t understand how short and precious life is. People just think life goes on and on and they take it for granted. It really gets under my skin sometimes.
Change the Response in the Moment
Today, when this happened, I decided to face it. I imagined the light of my consciousness illuminating my “pain body” and then poof! The strong emotions were gone. It was almost like magic. It was extremely simple.
I had not approached my feelings this way before reading Tolle’s book. I could have saved myself so many years of being derailed by my “pain body” and lived a lot happier. But everything has its time, and today it was my time to learn the power of bringing pain into full consciousness to transmute it.
Anxiety and Pain Have No Control Now
For so long I have lived with random anxiety related to this traumatic event, and now I have the tools to deal with it. I may never have anxiety again. All I have to do is look at this monster forming inside me in response to an innocent trigger and show it that nothing it’s based on is real in the present moment. It is a phantom of my past. It is not here and now with me.
When I recognize it, face it, and bring it into the light of the present moment, it no longer holds power over me.
If you’re also struggling with your “pain body” and crippled by anxiety or anger at times, I recommend transmuting the pain. The strong hold that these emotions have over you will dissipate or disappear. All you have to do is imagine it being illuminated by your consciousness, hold it in your awareness for a moment, and acknowledge it as past trauma that’s haunting you — but that in the present moment, there is nothing to fear. It’s only an illusion designed to keep you a slave to your past.
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