You can still be joyful after a loss.
As a child, I remember becoming aware that I could be happy while I was sad. I didn’t have the language awareness to be able to identify my emotions more clearly, but I had the philosophical perspective on my own consciousness that allowed me to rise above my mind. As I cried, I would become an observer of my thoughts and feelings. I could tell that while I was sad, simultaneously, I was a joyful being — just for being alive and having the ability to feel sad.
The truth is, we can grieve and be joyful at the same time. It sounds strange, I know. It’s because we are souls here having a human experience, and loss is part of that experience. Grief and loss are important aspects of the journey here on Earth. Don’t forget that. However, you should also remember that you are not your grief — that feeling belongs only to the character you’re playing in this current lifetime.
Depression is a state of mind when you give up all hope and feel like you’re sinking into an abyss. I’ve been there — I know all about it. It’s a deep state of sadness. It’s darkness.
Grief is a natural response to a great loss. Your body and mind can go into shock. You must absorb this shock, and oftentimes, that involves great sadness. But it doesn’t need to. Depression and grief are two different things.
You could instead choose to observe your feelings of grief and accept them without negative emotions. You don’t need to sink into a mental space of giving up hope. Instead of saying “I will never be happy again!” or “I hate the world because it’s taken happiness from me!” (normal thoughts in a state of grief depression), you could say: “A really bad thing happened to me. I will do my best to sit with that.”
You can maintain a positive mindset in a state of grief. You can stay hopeful. You can still manifest great things with an expansive outlook on the world. It may be very difficult, but it’s possible.
Here is an example: Ms. X is working on manifesting her dream life. She knows that keeping a positive mindset is key. But then, she experiences the loss of a close family member. She feels the positive, hopeful thoughts that were attracting abundance now slipping away. She feels herself begin to make sarcastic comments and generally expect the worst to happen.
Then, instead of giving in to the pain and allowing a cynical view of life to take over, she chooses to embrace the idea that she’s a positive and powerful person. She acknowledges that she needs time to allow the shock to pass and to heal. She gives herself grace. She does this without attaching herself to fearful, depressing thoughts about her new life. She knows that this is only a result of having loved deeply — if she had never loved, she would never have the ability to feel such deep pain. She finds gratitude in the love.
Like Ms. X, you can choose to have joy and gratitude anytime you want. Most people allow themselves to drown in sorrow. They identify with their pain and allow it to take over their lives. But you know better, don’t you? You know that you still have a life to live, and it can be full of wonder if you believe it. You know that you can allow grief to be part of that wonder, as you observe it instead of letting it eat you alive.
You are the consciousness that holds space for the grief (as well as all the other emotions, good and bad). You are not the grief itself. Rise above it.
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